Oh, the Places You Will Go!

I had to find a new boyfriend in Dam Square, because my last one (see picture below in preceding blog) was nowhere to be found. I chose this guy because of his really white teeth and the fact that he's such a snappy dresser.

Amsterdam was great this time around. There was just the right amount of chill to the air, no rain, lots of sunshine - just perfect. The hotel was great, the food was waaaaayyyyy better than I remember it from the last three times we were there and we were able to do a lot more sightseeing together than we've done before, thanks to a lighter schedule for Hubby at his conference.

We went to a wooden shoe factory where we saw the automated process that is now used to make wooden shoes. Fascinating! There are two machines - one to carve the shoe out of a big block of wood and another to scoop out the inside of the shoe to make room for a foot. The machine that shapes the shoe works on the same principle as a key duplication machine. The "pattern" shoe is locked into place, then the block of wood is locked in next to it. The machine operator turns the machine on and presto-chango a few short minutes later, you have a wooden shoe. The new shoe then goes to the second machine, where the inside is scooped out by an automated drill. Then the shoe is buffed and sanded and placed in a storage place to "cure." The wood is very wet, so it has to dry out for quite a while, but once it dries and hardens, the shoe is virtually indestructible. Somehow I still can't imagine how wooden shoes could be very comfortable, but supposedly they are. I didn't feel the need to buy a pair to test the theory, so I'll just have to take the shoemaker's word for it.

We saw three of the last operational wooden windmills that still exist in Holland. At one time, there were hundreds of them, now there are only a handful left. We even got to go inside one of them and see the inner workings. It was amazing. As was the Cheese Farm, where we were treated to a demonstration of the process for making Edam cheese.

But the absolute best part of our trip was the side trip we took to Brussels, Belgium. We rode the train from Amsterdam - it was a two-and-a-half hour trip. Brussels was incredible. I fell in love with the Old-world charm of the city. I took picture after picture - the architecture there is stunning. We drank Belgian beer, ate genuine Belgian waffles and bought Belgian chocolates. Brussels is breathtaking in its beauty and the people were charming - very warm and friendly.

On the train ride back to Amsterdam, I found myself marveling at the fact that we were able to hop on a train and a few short hours later, step off the train in a whole other country! The train system in Europe is amazing. We want to go back and tour Europe by rail.

I'm still jet-lagged, so I hope this post makes sense. My brain feels quite mushy at the moment, truth be told. I'll write more about our trip on another day when I can gather my wits a little better.

Farewell, So long, auf Wiedersehen, Adieu

Hubby and I will be jetting off to Amsterdam tomorrow for a week-long stay. He is going to attend a petroleum engineers conference and I am tagging along to... what else? Shop, go to museums, shop, go to Delft, shop, hang out in my hotel room and write in the peace and absolute quiet with no chance of being interrupted, shop, and then shop more. I don't know what I will do the second day.

This will be my third trip to merry olde Amsterdam. Since I've only been blogging a smidge over a year, most of you probably have not heard my rantings about the last time I was there, two years ago. If I had been writing then (which I wasn't - because I was basically insane, courtesy of the probate of my dad's estate) and if I had been blogging, you would have read my tale of woe about what a wretched time I had in Amsterdam.

The weather was horrible - not cold like it is supposed to be, so I packed all wrong, which made me very bitchy the whole time. Some idiot (and I'm not naming names, but it wasn't me) made our reservations at the completely wrong hotel and I was not happy about that, so I was a bitch about that the whole time - a very passive, aggressive bitch, mind you. I had a bad hair week, so I was really bitchy about that and I was fat(ter) then, so you know how bitchy that can make you, especially when you are trapped in a country of svelte, healthy people who either walk or bike every-damn-where so that there is not an ounce of fat on their bodies.

And then there was the anti-American sentiment. It was horrible. I've never felt so hated in my entire life. Of course, the bulk of the anti-American sentiment came from my own husband. I was the Ugly American to my hubby and he was indeed very anti-American. In retrospect, I would have to say that I probably deserved it, but if any of you ever tell him I said that, I will call you a damn liar. As I said, I was insane at the time - thank you very much Andrews, Texas and my deceased dad's blood-sucking wife and her blood-sucking sons (oh! did I say that out loud?) I'm much better now. I've been to therapy. I am medicated. And I am older and wiser.

Plus, I have lost a few pounds, have a good haircut and found my sense of humor once more. This time, I'm packing for any kind of weather the Weather-Gods of Amsterdam may choose to fling at me. Oh, and we are staying at the right hotel this time - thank God! It's an American-style hotel, as opposed to the typical European-style hotel. I've discovered that we Americans like to spread out. We want ROOM, dammit, and lots of it. We do not want to have to edge around the bed to squeeze past the dresser into the bathroom. While we're in the bathroom taking a shower, we want a FULL shower door, or at the very least a shower curtain. And God forbid that the closet door is open when you want to come out of the bathroom, because if it is, you might as well just take a seat in there. But, we're not staying at that hotel, so all is well.

As for the anti-American sentiment, I have found a solution to that as well. It's a miracle, I tell you. I have been trying a new tack (yes, that is how you spell it according to Webster's Dictionary - tack: (intransitive verb) to modify one's policy or attitude abruptly) with my own personal American. I decided that I would not get mad at him and act pissy over every little thing he did or said and that I would throw the passive-aggressive thing out the window; in short, that I would actually try being nice to him. You know, it's amazing how well he has responded to that. Who knew? I think I may be on to something here.

So, for any of you who ever heard me swear on everything holy that I would never travel with my hubby again and that I damn sure wouldn't be going to Amsterdam with him when the next conference came up, well, just forget I said that. I wasn't myself. Now I am. Myself, that is. Kinder, gentler Myself.

Happy, happy, joy, joy!

Every picture tells a story...

If you have a scrapbook addiction like I do, you know how expensive this hobby can get. I have a whole room full of scrapbook materials, tools, stickers, die-cut machines, quote books... you name it, I've got it. Add my photo addiction to that and you've got a real hobby explosion! I even have my granddaughter, Olivia, hooked on scrapbooking.

When she comes to my house, that's usually the first thing she wants to know. "Mimi, can we scrapbook?"

As much as I enjoy traditional scrapbooking, I've come to appreciate the ease and versatility of digital scrapbooking as well. The picture to the left is another example of one of my digital scrapbook pages. This one features my friends, Debra and Ramon; and there are even a couple of pictures of me in there. I like the way this particular digital scrapbooking program allows complete freedom, as opposed to some of the programs out there that only give you the option of pasting your photos into pre-formatted templates.

Below is another example of a digital page. For this one, I started with a blank page and used pages and elements that I bought and downloaded on the internet. There are so many fun items available.

Once again, my inspiration for this page was my friend Debra, pictured here with two of her weight-loss surgery buddies, Ramon and Yvonne. That's Ramon in the back, behind Debra and Yvonne wearing a pair of Ramon's pre-surgery shorts. Pretty amazing!

As I mentioned a few blog entries back, I will be opening my scrapbook business - The Storyteller's Nook - in the very near future. Watch this site for the announcement of my web site which will go live within the next two weeks.

I have been having a running dialogue with a buddy of mine on another blog site. I've been sending him all the "Texanisms" I can come up with concerning folks of a certain ilk. (Excuse me for a moment while I go off on a tagent... Don't you just love that word ilk? If you've been paying attention - otherwise known as 'hanging on my every word', you'll have noticed that I've become fond of using that word lately. It's a great word. Become friends with it. Buddy up to it. You'll be glad you did. But I digress.)

Now back to the subject at hand:"Texanisms" describing folk of a certain ilk. I've sent my friend jewels like these:

• He's three bricks short of a load.
• Her bread's not baked in the middle.
• He's about a half-bubble off plumb.

And the one that started it all:

• His cheese done slipped off the cracker.

You'll surely be happy to know that after extensive research - and when I say "extensive research, I mean I stumbled upon a book called Redneck Words of Wisdom in a gift store in Austin yesterday, for which I paid the paltry sum of $12.95 + tax - I have discovered additional colloquialisms to impart to y'all.

Now, I know there may be those of you out there in other Southern states who would like to lay claim to some of these colorful sayings. But, to you I say, NAY. What I am about to relate to you will be known as "Texanisms." Here are my reasons, which I am sure you will find to be of great merit.

1. This is my blog.
2. I bought the book.
3. Because I said so.

Any questions? No? I didn't think so. Let's proceed, shall we?

In the "Folks of a Certain Ilk" category:

• She's a taco short of a combination plate.
• He's a few fries short of a Happy Meal.
• She's a few sandwiches short of a picnic.

Now, for my own personal favorites. These are all straight from my grandparents' mouths, so they aren't just Texanisms, they're Panhandle Texanisms!

• You'd better shut your mouth or I'll slap you into the middle of next week.
• She'll talk your head off and then holler own the hole.
• Don't make me whup you like a red-headed stepchild.
• You lie like a cheap rug.
• Don't let your alligator mouth get ahead of your hummingbird ass.
• I guess she told you how the cow ate the cabbage!

Well, that was fun. Now, I think I'll make like a baby and head out.

Another Amazing Before and After - Ramon Lopez

As promised, I have been posting examples of my digital scrapbook pages for the last several days. Some of the pages of which I'm the proudest have to be the ones I've done for my two friends who have had weight-loss surgery which COMPLETELY changed their lives. Today's post is about another one of those amazing people.

I met Ramon Lopez through my friend Debra (If you haven't read about her yet, see below - she's an inspiration.) Ramon, like Debra, has overcome so many really hard things in his life and his weight-loss surgery was just the last in a long line of many. Like Debra, Ramon's life is totally different now than it was before his surgery.

Having worked in the employment industry, I know the prejudices that exist against people who are overweight. If I told you how much ignorance and just plain stupidity there is among hiring authorities who have a prejudice against people who are overweight, you would be appalled. Without exception, my biggest challenge in staffing was in placing people who had every qualification yet didn't fit the idiotic notion that skinny and smart went hand-in-hand. I read somewhere that prejudice against overweight people is the last "acceptable" prejudice in our nation. Sad, but all too true.

You can read more about my friends Debra and Ramon (as well as their friend Yvonne) on their website:

www.rydobesity.com

Debra, Before and After

My friend, Debra

Debra and I have been friends for well over ten years. She is the kind of friend who could inspire the popular adage, "We will always be best friends; you know all my secrets." Debra and I are joined at the heart. Deb has gone through some incredible changes over the last several years. One of the most significant changes is that she has lost over one-hundred pounds; and she has kept it off for over four years. Her life is completely different now than it was before her weight-loss. She could have decided to simply enjoy her new life, but that's not who she is. Instead, she actively mentors others who are still on the road to achieving their weight-loss goal. She is very active in an organization called Obesity Help http://www.obesityhelp.com/ as a speaker and a conference organizer. I'm proud of my friend, proud enough that I want everyone to know about her strength, her determination and her courage.

Boys, boys, boys

I have started a scrapbooking business. I teach classes in traditional and digital scrapbooking. I also will be holding crops where you will be able to purchase traditional scrapbook supplies and/or spend your day working with other enthusiasts on your scrapbook pages. Or if you like, you can make use of my digital scrapbook software to make pages like the one to the left.

Over the next several days, I'll be displaying more of my digital pages on my blog, as well as finishing up my web site -The Storyteller's Nook. As soon as the web site is ready to go live, I'll post a link in my blog.

Until next time... happy scrapbooking!

The Many Faces of Olivia

My beautiful Olivia. She has a smile that can turn your world upside down and enough personality to share. Already at four years old, she is a brilliant conversationalist. She is absolutely fearless and has everyone in the family wrapped around her little finger. My shining star - my lovely granddaughter, Olivia Monet.

Death to Trojans

No, not that kind of Trojan. I'm talking the computer virus kind of Trojan. I just spent the last two hours since arriving at my son's apartment in Austin for a leisurely visit with him, trying to remove a malicious spyware program that he unwittingly installed at school (UT-Austin) this morning. It's one of those programs that disguises itself as an anti-virus program. It pops up with a very official-looking "Windows" icon and a dire warning that your computer is infected with 48 viruses and spyware programs, then gives the user the option of two buttons: one says "ignore threats" and the other says "remove threats." Of course, when you push the one that says "remove threats," it actually installs the trojan on your computer. It's a tough one, too.

It took me forever to get it uninstalled. I finally got it off with Windows Defender - thank God for some of Vista's new features. This one turned out to be a life-saver. Beware!

I Can't Stop Myself

Truly, there isn't much I can add to these pictures. They pretty much say it all. Further proof that a picture really is worth a thousand words.

We're Not in Illinois Anymore

Create your own FACEinHOLE

Mardi Gras 2009

Make a Smilebox slideshow